There is a famous quote by Google’s Mo Gawdat: ‘Happiness is like keeping fit. You have to work out’. Before he joined Google, while working as stock trader and tech executive in Dubai and in response to a period of depression, he used his engineer’s mindset to create an “equation for happiness”. The equation says that happiness is greater than, or equal to, your perception of the events in your life minus your expectation of how life should be. Scientific research demonstrates that the more income you get the more happy you will become; but once you get to average income your happiness plateaus. Ironically when you go even higher, wealth starts to work against you – people start to treat you differently; you start to feel a constant disappointment.
Against this backdrop, MS (as we have begun to refer to our own legendary scribe), has elegantly articulated in her article that Life is a balance between making it happen and letting it happen. But generally speaking, hard work brings luck – read happiness! – CLN Newsdesk
Happiness: A simple word, yet perhaps the most misunderstood pursuit of our time. In an age where everything is measured – growth, success, production/productivity – it is surprising that we still struggle to understand something as fundamental as Happiness. A simple idea, often overlooked quietly explains much of our dissatisfaction.
Today, expectations have become heavier than reality itself. We expect success to come early, relationships to be perfect, careers to be smooth, and life to unfold exactly as planned. In reality, as it inevitably does falls short of these inflated expectations, disappointment sets in – not because life is unfair, but because our expectations were unrealistic.
We see this everywhere. A job that once would have been considered a blessing is now dismissed as inadequate. A simple life filled with small joys is overshadowed by the constant comparison with others. We are no longer living our lives, we are measuring them against an imaginary standard.
If our expectations are met , we call it happiness. If they are not we call it failure. Life it seems has been reduced to a simple and dangerous formula. But here is the uncomfortable question we refuse to ask – who decides what our expectations should be?
Take the case of planters and growers. For generations earning a steady, honest income was considered dignity. Today when earnings are stable, it is seen as “not enough “. Input costs rise, uncertainties grow, yet expectations keep climbing. The result is not just financial stress, but a quiet erosion of self-worth.
When “enough” is never clearly defined, nothing even feels sufficient. So how do we define a reasonable expectation? A reasonable expectation is not built on comparison – it is built on contrast. It takes into account one’s effort, environment, limitations, and risks. It is grounded in what can be controlled, not in what others have achieved, it allows for uncertainty, failure and time.
Perhaps it is time to change the question itself. Instead of asking “Did i meet my expectations? We should ask, “were my expectations fair to begin with?
Happiness doesn’t lie in endlessly raising expectations. It lies in defining them wisely and knowing when “Enough is truly Enough“.
Nicely done!!
A truly thought provoking piece. Mamatha has captured the reality many live with but rarely articulate the silent burden of rising expectations especially among our planters. This is not just an article, but a much needed wake- up call. Well written and powerfully conveyed.
Yes…I agree…100%.👌
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Good article by Ms Mamatha Subbaiah. She writes well.
Happiness can mean different things at different times of a human’s life, as also the profession we choose.
When we’re young it’s all about good food, education, sporting activities, holidays and friends. And then based on what we pursue as a vocation – a good job in a safe company. For a Planter, like the majority of us in Coorg, good rains, crop and prices! And the cynic stated – less Nammes, less wasteful expenditure on weddings, measured consumption of alcohol!! Here’s to an abundance of HAPPINESS!!
As I read this article on “Happiness”, it brought to my mind something that I came across recently:
He can’t use his laptop because he’s holding a drink.
He can’t drink because he has a cigar in his mouth.
He can’t smoke his cigar because both hands are occupied.
This is a masterpiece and can be ascribed to happiness too – in the thrill of the chase for material things, we are blinded by the consequences of pursuit of the “catch”.
An excellent insightful article. My take is that happiness, like joy, is a fleeting trait. Human life is not fundamentally designed for permanent, everlasting happiness (or sadness for that matter) come what may. One can’t achieve happiness by planning or chasing after it; one should have the ability to recognise a happy event/outcome and enjoy it while it lasts