The term “Settling Down” is not unfamiliar to us. Every person at some point is faced with the question of settling down. The whole concept of ‘Settling Down’ is misleading. It was not until recently that I was asked ‘ what does settling down mean? And I could not help visualizing the sand that descends down to gradually rest at the base when put in a glass of water. This was probably the quickest and most apt phenomenon I could recollect. But settling actually mean resting at a base? In that case, do we live our lives to settle down? Or live to explore different dimensions? We were told to study well and go out. We were never told to study well and come here and do something with our knowledge. The farther away we go to a bigger city, the better it looks for the world. Somehow everything is good is outside. Our houses are getting spacious because the inhabitants have left. The children have moved out. Most of our peers, juniors, seniors, cousins, relatives are all out. It is beautiful to dream, to do great in life. But why are we told that big dreams can only become a reality outside? Why is it still a shame to be in our small towns?
‘Settling Down’ is a mirage. Life by its very nature is dynamic and ever changing. The sooner we accept this reality, the sooner we can stop chasing the illusion of stability and start embracing the infinite game we are playing rather than waiting down to settle down, we must learn to find meaning in our struggles in happiness in the process. We may truly settle down at the end of our lives, even that is not certain.
We think we will settle down after finishing our studies, may be after marriage, then we think we might settle down after being successful which does not happen. Certainly, after having kids. Do we? After the kids grow up, absolutely not. I love being here in Kodagu with trees and birds but it is disappearing too. The old buildings, houses are vanishing with that. I hope we can take pride in coming back to our hometowns and creating opportunities here. Of course! There are more opportunities outside. But opportunities can come here too. We have just gone along with the idea that Kodagu is only good to visit and not live. Let’s return to our homes in the true essence. Life is not meant to settle down. Life is meant to struggle, to explore, to wander, to love, to learn, to unlearn, to fail, to rebel, to live. In my opinion “Settling Down” is meant for the dead and not for the living, as far as one is alive, there must be some moves.
‘Settle Down ‘ did someone say? Think about it. Cheers to life. Enjoy and celebrate every moment for the sheer joy of being around and for the choices it gives you.
Kodandera Mamatha Subbaiah
